Text on the 1080 blackmail threat in New Zealand in 2014:
"It was later revealed that [the person behind the threat] was a 60-year-old businessman (clearly not all terrorists are stereotypical) named Jeremy Kerr..."

I dunno, at this point you say "terrorist" and I'm a lot more inclined to think of a middle-aged white man than anything else.

The campus maintenance service request form asks which floor of this building the problem is on: 10th, 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, basement, penthouse, or roof.

If only there were some intuitive way to order the floors of a building.

My wife has a fun game she plays where she waits for a frosty night where the roads are nice and icy, tells me "Okay be home with the kiddo soon!", and then stays out a while longer to give me a solid hour of wondering whether they've slid into a ditch and died horribly.

It's fun!

body horror-ish I guess 

"Why zip along quick, fam? Just relax and vibe" contains all the letters of the alphabet

nosimpleprotege: *quietly repeating a few syllables to herself for several minutes*
me: What is "baddagoom"? Can you show me? Can you tell me what "baddagoom" is?
nosimpleprotege:

Just according to baekaku

(Translator's note: baekaku means plans you made with your SO)

Tonight during coloring nosimpleprotege handed me the black crayon

what can I say

I am

food 

Nobody ever picks Ground. I'll be Ground-type, because I want to be unique but there's nothing actually special about dirt.

(Regular dirt. Not @dirt , who is a treasure.)

mh- 

food, the gross parts of childcare 

"This week in Colorado History, 'a group of scruffy gold-seekers founded a town to supply all of the minors who were going into the foothills and mountains to find gold,' Bock said."

Child labor was really something in 1858.

parenting, proximal learning 

gonna sum up the presentation I gave yesterday on American southern cuisine real quick 

amusing myself with kiddo's alphabet toys while she's in the bath 

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