When the vaccination is offered through mobile services that administer at your own residence, will we not all of us be Home Stuck

Even if all staff are fully vaccinated, the CDC recommends against holding staff meetings when they could have been an email.

My wife liked stuff. She was sentimental enough that her possessions brought her happiness. I wasn't gonna yuck her yum while we were married but now that she's gone I realize just how little stuff I really need.

So after a dozen runs to a thrift dropoff that would make Marie Kondo go "Whoa buddy maybe you oughta slow down", I can say with some confidence that most of the stuff that made it to the new apartment belongs to my daughter.

: Pulled the back off the recliner, was carrying the base downstairs to put in the car to take to the new apartment. A full, unopened tube of toothpaste fell out of the recliner base.

...okay, multiple questions.

Dog Check is the greatest bop on the Deltarune soundtrack do not @ me

I hope this email finds you living in a shotgun shack
I hope this email finds you in another part of the world
I hope this email finds you behind the wheel of a large automobile
I hope this email finds you in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife

My life is a cliche.
You know that thing where a film protagonist is having a really rough time, and just to drive it home they're walking down the road in the rain or something, and a car drives by and kicks up a big spray of cold, filthy water off the street and drenches them? Now the character is sad, bedraggled, and soaked for good measure.
Just happened to me.

Yep. Looks like she ghosted me.

Oh it's cool, not literally this time.

Watching the first time I wondered passingly what makes an animal an animal or a person in the Peppa Universe, but that's kind of the whole joke. "We're going to see an animal that's very very tall." "A giraffe!" "Yes, my dad works here", says the kid who is a giraffe. Then they go to the butterfly pavilion.

It's weirdly subtle to do it by obliquely referencing how their teacher is a prey species every other line, though.

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Peppa Pig is awful. I've yet to meet a parent who doesn't agree.

But I have to grant that the running gag in the episode where they go to the zoo is pretty good. A lion stalks up behind Madame Gazelle and startles the crap out of her, but it's a zookeeper who tours the tortoise enclosure. A crocodile pops out of the water and startles the crap out of Mme. Gazelle, but it's the keeper who gives a tour of the penguin enclosure, etc.

It's a good bit, if bad for Mme. Gazelle's nerves.

Now she's reaching into her milk with her fingers to retrieve all sorts of pretend foods, from cookies to fish, to share with me.

kids are weird.

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nosimpleprotege picked up a rectangular piece of foam, held it to her ear, and said "Hello, this is [her own first name and last name] speaking. My ham is in my milk. Okay, talk to you later." then poked the foam with her finger to hang up.
Now she did in fact drop a slice of deli ham into a cup of milk, so that's an accurate report... to whoever it was she felt she needed to call with the status of her dinner.

I was worried that my daughter, ignorant of the dangers, would mess around with electrical sockets and hurt herself.

Now I'm worried that my daughter, curious after I talked to her about the dangers of electricity, will mess around with electrical sockets and hurt herself.

me, folding laundry: good lord the only way a child would need this many pajamas is if she were wearing four or five sets in a day

me, introducing underwear in leiu of diapers: oh

The official platform best etiquette list, better known as Masto-dos and Masto-don'ts

Wasn't expecting the entire state of Texas's power grid to be Rush Limbaugh's last horcrux, but it's an odd world we live in

If I hated gender-neutral bathrooms I would simply live my life in a way that did not guarantee my gravesite would become one

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dads.cool is a Mastodon instance for dads, running the Hometown fork of Mastodon.